2k8 ! (:

First off, let me wish you all a Merry Christmas. (:

Too bad this blog isn't going to be about christmas. Lol. It's going to be my personal reflection of this year. :]. 2008 feels like it just came and went. It's amazing how fast time can go by . It feels like yesterday I was celebrating New Year's with my family. Now here I am a year older. A year somewhat wiser. Blogging about a year that felt just flew right by. This year has had it's ups and downs. But doesn't it always happen like that? One moment you feel like you're at thee bottom. Then you feel like you're on top of the world and thinking about how happy you are.



This year I personally, lost some stuff, but I also gained. I lost another uncle this year. But I'm thinking about the positives. I know that he's happy up there in heaven with his parents and his brother. The thought of that makes me happy. I lost other things also, but losing those things allowed me to gain more knowledge. I learned not to trust people that easily. It has taught me to take life slow, that there isn't a need to rush or get into things. I learned so much this year. I'm glad I did. I also learned how to learn from my mistakes. I'll say, I'm not proud at some of the things I have done this year, but I'm very thankful that now I know that what I did was wrong and that when I have to encounter those type of situations again I'll know what to do. To those who have hurt me this year, thank you, for you have made me stronger. (:



This year may have been sad and bad for me sometimes. But I got through it. I'm glad that I had my family and friends helping me get through this year. I may have lost a relative or friend but I got over it. I may have lost alot of things. But hey, I gained. I've been blessed with a new relative and new friends. Thanks to this year I'm believing in the saying "When a door closes, a new one opens." I've lost alot this year. But I've been able to gain or re-gain. I'm glad that this year has taught me a lot. I think I'm actually starting to mature now. My perspective on life has changed. Back then I would always be thinking of all the negatives in life. I would be wishing for something that I don't have. Now, I'm thankful for whatever I have in life. I don't really wish for things anymore. I'm just glad for what I have. I don't want to lose the things I have so I appreciate them/it while I still can.


2k8;; I've gotten hurt alot this year. But I've learned from it. It could've been the worse year, it could've been the best. All I know is I'm glad that I've gotten through it all. Who knows? Maybe next year will be better or worse. I just know that I'll get through it. (:

Next blog will be the last blog written in 08' >___<
-April Maii <333 (:

Music :]

I would like to dedicate a whole blog about music. Now I know most of you are thinking, "Why would you do that?". I'll tell you this. Why wouldn't I make a blog about music? I mean music is pretty much my life. Haha. I know this will seem like I have no life. But I pretty much have music playing 24/7. Either from the radio, my computer, my Ipod, my phone, etc. I love listening to music.

Music can set my mood at any moment. I can pretty much find a song any mood type. When I'm sad and I have no one to talk to all I got to do is play music and I'll feel better. I love finding new music or re-discovering old ones. It's like finding hidden treasure. :] Finding music is always fun. Especially finding music that I fall in love with. Some songs are so addicting that I have to listen to them over and over again. I won't get tired of that song until I listen to it over 100 times. [[It's true. Haha. I didn't get tired of the song Mad By Ne-yo until the 113th time I listened to it. I counted. :P]] Music has been sooooo addicting to me. It's my way of getting high. I don't get high off of drugs, I get high off of music. :]

Songs are like people, you can't really understand them until you actually listen to them and try to understand their lyrics. You have to feel their beats. You have to get their history. You have to just feel the song. You might be thinking I'm a weirdo for comparing music to humans. But try it. Just maybe you'll understand me.

I love listening to music that I can connect to. Like listening to songs I can relate to. I can't really relate to songs about being in gangs or getting shot. Don't get me wrong I like the music I just can't really relate to it. I relate to love songs alot. Haha. I don't know why but I really do. I relate to songs made or sung by Ne-yo alot. I really do not understand why but I think it's just because he's a good artist. Hmm. Music that I can relate to are normally the ones that are on my playlists.


I'll write another blog soon, I don't know what it will be about. Hmm. Hopefully it's good.
-April Maii <33 :]

Who I really am .

Well chyea . Many people normally get the wrong first impression about me. They think that I'm a snob. That I'm a bad person . They think that I'm going to make fun of them or something. They think that I'm the type of person that will judge them and leave them in the dust. When the truth is, I'm not. I'm the type of person that will care about anyone. Okay, I exaggerated about that. I'm the type of person that will care about someone until they prove to me otherwise.

These people that think I'm a snob or something are the ones that I want to prove wrong. I try to be friendly. I try to be the girl you can say hi to in the hallways. I'm trying to be the type of girl that you can be friends easily with. I'm the type of girl that wants to be friends with everyone and hated by no one. I feel like I can achieve this. It's going to be hard but I'll be able to hopefully.

Some of my closest friends think that I'm very trustworthy and friendly. My friend whiteey thinks that I'm a an amazing and true friend. I don't know if she's just sucking up or not. :] hehe joking. Mih friends are the ones that are amazing. They can make me feel better anyday. I love them with all my heart. I can't believe that they think I'm a good friend when they are the ones that are all good friends.

Hehe I'll do some more blogging later :]
-April Maii <333 (;



i luhv this gihrl
<33 whiteyy.

My Family <3 -Warning this might be long :]

Hmm . For this certain blog I wanted to talk about the people that I call my family. I'm on vacation with them right now so I thought that it was best to talk about them because I've been able to spend more time with them. Sometimes, I admit that I think that my family is weird and embarrising. But sharing this vacation with them has showed me that I'm lucky to have such a weird and crazy family instead of having a boring and never talking to each other type family. My family consists of my parents, my auntie, my grandparents, and my dogs. (:



On our way to our a little getaway we spent 14 hours together in a car. You would've thought I'd go crazy right? Surprisingly no. I had a wonderful time. My family and I spoke Taglish (tagalog mixed with english) and were just getting to reconnect with each other. Since I'm at school for such a long time. My dad has to go to work from 6pm-3am. My auntie is at work from 9am-6pm. My grandma is at work from 3pm-12am. We never have any actual family time. When we were in the car though we made up for all the times we didn't share together. I felt like a little kid again. When I was younger we would always go on family road trips to places like Nevada, Disney Land, Washington, Canada, Oregon, and many more places. It was times like those that made me always happy. While we were in the car I could tell that my dad was getting sleepy. So to make him wake up I asked my mom to put some music on from our Ipod. I asked her to play songs that could make us dance and sing. So she did. Everybody was quiet but me. I was singing and screaming. I was off-tune. I was dancing like a fool in the car. After a song or two my auntie and mom got into it. They started to go crazy like me. My grandparents laughed it off and tried dancing. My dad, well since he was driving, he used the steering wheel as his drum sets. It was a moment I will never forget. The music was super loud. After a while I got tired and fell asleep. My family though were still singing and dancing. I was glad to have made them wake up.



My parentals ;

My parents are nice, caring , funny , and loving parents. My parents are still married after such a long time. Yes, at times they can be strict about things and yes they can be well parents. But that's what parents are for right? Haha. They have reasons why they are strict and mean. They have reasons why they care about me so much. So whenever they say that I can't do something I know it's because it's what's right for me. My dad is such a great dad. He's the one that taught me a whole bunch about sports. He taught me how to play basketball, football, how to ride a bike, and alot more. Yes, I'm a girl but it doesn't matter because I love doing all of those things. My dad can put a smile on anyones face. When I was in middle school, two of my friends came over to my house one time. We were bored and just listening to music. My dad went to my room and started shaking his "stuff". My friends were laughing so hard that their faces were turning red. I however was so embarrased that my face was just turning red. My friends have always told me that they like my dad because he's so cool and funny. My mom is the one that has taught me about pretty much everything. Sometimes she seems mad but normally she's mad because I did something wrong. I normally don't realize that I've done something wrong till later on in life. My mom is retired already. She has really bad migraines which has been trying to take over her life. But my mother is strong, she's fighting against those migraines. After a long day and going to sleep with a headache. She still knows that tomorrow is going to be a better day. My mother has always told me that I should never be scared to try something, because if I don't try it I'll never know what I missed out on. My madre is a strong women. She's super independent. I hope that one day I can be independent just like her. (:



My auntie;

My auntie has been living with my parents and I for a while now. She has been like a second mother to me. When I was about 3 or 4 my mom used to work grave-yard shift. My mom was there to say goodnight when she left and good morning when she came back. But it was different because I was still really young and I needed my mom to be there with me when I was going to sleep. So my auntie did. She used to sing to me and made sure that I was fine. She always took care of me without ever complaining. She and I have made many little inside jokes throughout our time together. We danced and sung alot. We made memories like we were sisters, friends, and auntie & niece. As I got into middle school she helped me out with troubles I had. She would give me advice about anything I asked advice for. In 9th grade, she pretty much did my hair, make-up, and got my clothes ready for my first homecoming dance. I thought that she did an awesome job. I have respect for my auntie. But at times it's as if she's a sister more than an auntie to me. We get into arguments as if we are sisters. We would joke and talk to each other as if we are sisters. She's like a second mom and a sister I never had.

My grandparents;
My grandparents that live with me are the parents of my mom and auntie. They have been living with us for some quite time now. They have been supporting me and cheering me on since I was a baby. I love them so much. I don't say it as often as I should but they should know that I do. They are pretty much the only people in my family that I'll talk to in complete tagalog sentences. Haha. I don't know. I just feel like they won't laugh at me if I mess up. It's fun because they ask me questions about school and stuff. I'll tell them. Even if it takes me a while because I have to form the answer in my mind. They don't mind as long as I try they say. I'm starting to get more comfortable with my tagalog because of them. I owe them alot. They are always here for me. I admit that sometimes I don't always but I do appreciatte them alot.

Actually, I appreciate having such a wonderful family. If it weren't for them I wouldn't be here today. Without their love and support I wouldn't be who I am now. I thank having them in my life. I don't say it that often but they should know that I am. I am very thankful. I might still be young to some people but I have learned alot life lessons thanks to my family. If any of my family members are reading this, know that I'm glad to have you in my life. Thank you very much & I love you!


Blog viewers be aware a new blog will appear soon. (:
-April Maii . <333

Christmas - Filipino Style

I know, that most of you are thinking, isn't kind of early to be blogging about Christmas ? No it's not ! Why would it be? Please remember that I'm filipina. Typically filipinos start celebrating Christmas in September. They don't stop celebrating till after the first week of January . That's like 5 MONTHS OF CHRISTMAS ! haha.


I love it though because I was watching the Filipino Channel [[Yes, I understand Tagalog]] and they started counting how many more days there were till Christmas on the first day of September. I was like "Mom why are they counting down already?" My mom told me that they always do. At first I was like "Wow that is such a long time!" But then I realized that they probably celebrate it so long so that it can be more time with the family. See filipinos pretty much love spending their free time with their families. Our priorities are; God, Family, School, Friends, Etc. My family believes in the saying "Friends come and go, but families are forever".

I love Christmas, not just because I get presents and stuff but because I get to see alot my family members that I don't normally see during the year. It's a time of year to give thanks to all the things I have. Even though Christmas is celebrated for such a long time, it has it's reasons why it should be. No matter what, I want to celebrate my Christmas on September 1- the end of the last week of January. I want to keep that Filipino tradition going on.



New blog soon ;D
-April Maii <333

Fear and Worrying.

"Sometimes we miss out on the chance of true happiness because of the fears and worries that we have." -Anonymous.


Hi there once again. (:

Well this blog I wanted to chose the topic of fear and worrying. Ohhh. Scary right? Just kidding. It's nothing scary at all. It's just sometimes in one person's life they are either scared or worried about something making them miss out on their chance of really being happy. Maybe this has happen to you my blog readers, or it hasn't happened. I don't know it's your life. I'm speaking from personal experience that this does happen.

Many things happen during someone's life. We all have to make choices even if they are good or bad, we still have to make them. But have you ever had to make a choice, and then become miserable because of it? Have you ever thought that I could've been happier with that choice? Well I have. I mean like I'm happy with some of the choices I have made in the past. But looking back some of the choices I have made make me go "Come on I chose that over that? What was I thinking?" Sometime in a lifetime you start to grow up and mature and wonder "Why did I make those foolish mistakes?" Or "What was keeping me from that?Couldn't I see that the other thing was going to make me happier?".


Sometimes I get scared of thinking of fear. Sometimes, when I am sad or mad or just thinking I begin to wonder what decision has made me feel this way. I wonder how come I couldn't see before which choice was going to make me happy. It sucks looking back at some of my choices and being sad about it. I want to be happy when I think of my past. I don't want to be all sad about it. I wonder why I didn't do that instead of that when it was so obvious that I would be 10x happier. I don't know, I guess with each mistake you really do learn something.

I personally worry alot. Whether it is about my family, school, friends, or anything. I just worry alot. I can't help it, that's just the type of person I am. Normally if a little thing bad happens I begin to worry alot. I need to be more chill about stuff. I need to learn that it's okay to worry about somethings, but not to worry so much about everything. I need to be happy with what I've got while I still have it, instead of worrying that I'm going to lose it. I need to stop wishing for things I don't have and just start appreciating what I do have because once it is gone, I'll be wishing it's still here. I need to stop worrying so much because me worrying so much can cost me my happiness. I really need to start doing all these things.

Could it be that we, as people, have fears of being truly happy? In the world that we live in, are we afraid of being too happy? Do we worry if we are happy and that it's not fair while other people are sad and miserable? I know that we worry about us being happy and everything. But I don't know. Sometimes it seems like we are scared of being happy, i just don't know why.





Want more of my thoughts?
Be patient and your wish will be granted. ;D
-April Maii <333

Sorry.

Sorry; feeling regret, compunction, sympathy, pity, etc


Have you noticed how many times people say the word sorry? Do you ever wonder whenever someone says sorry if they actually mean it? Normally, I don't, but lately after someone says sorry to me like whenever they accidently hit me, or say something wrong, or hurt me without them knowing i ask myself, "do they really mean it?".

People normally say sorry just because it's a habit. I say sorry alot. I don't know. I just say sorry whenever I think it's neccesary. Sometimes when I say it I mean it. Sometimes I say it because I think it's the right thing to do. Sometimes I say it to my friends whenever I talk to them and just say it out of nowhere, normally then I wouldn't mean it.

Whenever my friends and I talk and say something funny but think that it will hurt the other person's feelings we don't think about saying sorry we just do it because we think it's what's right. I mean like I know when my friends say sorry they mean it whenever it's something real. But when we joke around, I wonder if they really mean their sorries.

Whenever someone gets into a fight with another person and they resolve their problems and say sorry do they really mean it? Are they not going to hold a grudge? Are they really forgiving the other person? If you don't say sorry alot but say it whenever you truly mean it does it make it better or worse then someone that always says sorry but only sometimes means it?

I would just like it if people said sorry and actually mean it. Tell me is that too hard to ask for ?

Soon another blog will be posted (:

-April Maii <3>